Special needs twins may strike terror into the heart of any parent. And to be honest, they did for me in the beginning. There are obviously still days that make me weep with pity and maybe drink a bit too much wine. But you know, special needs twins are great for so many reasons.
Special Needs Twins have Each Other
The bond that any twins have is usually very strong. There is however the perception that this bond must be broken in order to create two fully formed human beings. I won’t lie that we considered this option very seriously. It does seem logical that twins need to have time on their own to develop. But why break something that is so comforting? This is especially true for special needs twins, I believe. The world is a noisy, confusing, scary place. At least they have someone who is always on their side and with whom they can process.
Bullying is also a real consideration. Six year olds don’t view differences as something worth teasing about. But older children will tease and I have seen it. It’s quite heartbreaking and my mamma bear instincts kick in big time. For my boys, having each other and being so into each other means that they care a lot less about what others think of them. And they will always have an ally. This really gives me a lot of comfort.
Special Needs Twins live in a Magical World
I am sometimes envious of the crazy magical world that the boys live in. It looks like a place that is lots of fun. And has its own complicated rules! Not the mention the unique language that is spoken there. And how great to live in a place where there is someone who laughs at your unusual jokes. They also create the most amazing games that only they understand.
Don’t get me wrong. It’s not sunshine and roses all the time. They can fight like crazy and it can be quite scary because they can really hurt each other. I suppose this is part of their frustration at not being able to control their twin at all times. But it always ends and there is never any residual anger.
Special Needs Twins are Spared the Pressure
I am by nature a fiercely competitive person. I used to eagerly tick off milestone and be thrilled if the boys were ahead in some way. Obviously those milestones do not apply at all any more. And it’s quite a relief not to have to adhere to these predefined ideas of what a child should be able to do. The rules have gone out of the window and any developments are exciting. You become thankful for small things and awed by what they can do. They have the chance to take their time and to not grow up too fast. They will eventually get there, but in their own unique way. And that is why we are thinking about homeschooling them.
What are your Thoughts on Special Needs Children?
What is your favourite thing about having a special needs child? I would love to hear your opinions. Please drop me an email or comment below. Yay for special needs kids!