Banish the guilt. You’re not a bad mom!
Why is it that sometimes you feel like you have it all together? Everything in your life flows. And you are a picture-perfect parent. And then at other times you feel like the worst mother on the planet? Everything is a struggle and nothing seems work. Mom guilt has some insane power. But I don’t believe that it’s always necessary. Sometimes by taking a breath, you will see that you’re not a bad mom. In fact, you’re probably pretty darn good at it! In this post I have some tips that help me to be a bit gentler with myself.
You’re not a bad mom. You’re just human.
- Take a breath. Sometimes you just need to step away from your life a bit. When you take the emotion out of a situation, it’s usually easier to see it more clearly. Obvious stuff. But sometimes it’s hard to extract yourself. I am the biggest fan of a good, vigorous walk. It clears the head and also helps to release those lovely endorphins. And voilà! Better mom.
- Make time for self care. Self care can’t be overstated. It is super important to take some time for yourself because it’s to the benefit of everybody. If you’re feeling relaxed, then everything is that much easier. And you’re probably also less likely to bite someone’s head off.
- Take care of yourself. Sometimes you need to go deeper in order to practise proper self care. This means taking care of your health, eating well and doing exercise. You’ll find that negative thoughts will often melt away after a run. And you’re less likely to have a sugar crash, which ends in a grumpy mum, if you eat good food.
- Be aware of your cycle. Hormones can wreak havoc on a peaceful home. But if you’re aware of the ups and downs, then you can manage them better. Writing a journal or tracking your period with an app can really help you to see patterns. I love using the Flo App. It helps me to give my family storm warnings.
- Don’t compare. We’re in an age of comparison. With everything on display, and also styled to the max, it’s hard not to feel inferior. Not every mom can be patient, loving and present, while also being super fit and fashionable, having a successful business and taking time for long and romantic date nights. Not unless there are many, many helper elves making this perfect life happen. It helps to cut down on Instagram time. Or to only follow real people. Most importantly, do you. And revel in your unique and messy life.
If you’re reading this, then you’re not a bad mom!
If you’ve clicked through to this post, then you’re probably not a bad mom. By reading and doing research and feeling bad, it shows you give a sh*t. You’re probably someone who is normal and human. You have bad days when you shout at your kids. And you have good days when you make them heart-shaped sandwiches for lunch. If your kids are loved, fed and protected, then you’re the best mom in the world!